by Kenny Liu

Dear Santa,

As a humble servant of your empire, I would like to offer a hearty congratulations on how things are going. Christmas is still as celebrated as it was last time we spoke, and your name still synonymous with magic.

I would also like to present to you my Christmas wish: Sir, please let me be wrong.

As I am aware of how busy you must be, I haven't asked anything of you since I was six years old. I am a simple person. It doesn't take much to make me smile and I am easily entertained. I do not need much in this world to be happy. Please know that I hate to bother you with my petty problems, but that sometimes, I need your guidance.

When I was six, I asked you to give me a most unusual present: to be able to see the future. I have been extremely happy with the gift and could not imagine anything that I could have wanted more. It has given me more than I could ever imagine: joy, sorrow, frustration, anger, resignation, and love. The future is a funny thing. It's never set in stone, a flitting vision of what could be. When I was young, I was under the impression that what I saw was for real. And for a time, that's how it was. Everything I saw did happen. I wasn't always happy with the results, but I accepted them nevertheless.

I once told somebody that I could predict the future, but they didn't believe me. They told me that the best way to predict the future was to invent it.

And so I did.

At the slightest nudge of my will, my visions would cloud over and then clear again. The future became my future, the way I wanted things to be. I had so much control, so much power. Things happened because I wanted them to. My word was law. My destiny was my own.

Until now.

I have always been aware of powers greater than me, and I have always stayed out of their way. To interfere, to fight a lost battle, is something I never found appealing, as would anyone in their right mind.

Sir, I have seen the future, and despite everything I have done, it has not changed. It's not simply a matter of my will not being strong enough. It is beyond my reach. It is something I cannot touch. Someone somewhere has shown me my future and I cannot change it.

Let me be honest. I do not like what I see, nor do I want it.

The future has always happened as I have seen it. As a loyal peasant, I am making an impassioned plea for me to be wrong. Please let me be wrong. Of all the times that I have been right, just this once, I would like to be wrong. Just this once I want to see that what I have seen is only a figment of my imagination. Just this once I want to know that my intuition was misguided and has misjudged. Just this once I want to be shown that my logical reasoning has been faulty. I see my target ahead of me. May the laws of physics steer me away.

Sir, my Christmas wish: tell me I am wrong.

No reply is necessary. I trust you will make the right decision, whether or not it be in my favor, and I will accept your decision without regret and without question. I shall always remain loyal to you, you who have shown me the truly wonderful things in this Universe.

Forever in debt to you,


- December 1996 -